Well your ass is like a stovepipe, Nellie Darling,
And the nipples on your tits are turning green,
There’s a thousand flies buzzing round your pussy,
You’re the filthiest fucking bitch I’ve ever seen.
There’s a yard of lint protruding from your navel,
When you piss, you piss a stream as green as grass,
There’s enough wax in your ear to make a candle,
Why don’t you make one and shove it up your ass?
Your breath could knock a buzzard off a shit wagon,
And you ingrown toenails exude a pussy cream,
Your nose hair’s long enough to braid in curls,
You’re every Colombo Harrier's fucking dream!